The Words of a Love Song

Journal entry from years ago...

~oh, ashley... did you mean for the words of your song to speak to my heart as if they were the words of the Lord? that's what's happened tonight. in my despair, the Lord spoke to my heart with your words. He said, "All that you bring to the table is love. And that is so much. That is so much..." in response, my heart rested in Him as He brought more than enough to feed my empty soul. it is by His grace that i am what i am. and it is by His grace that i'm able to give to those who are most important in my life. ashley, thank you for the words of that song. and thank you for your continuing encouragement. you are a blessing, dear one. you are a blessing.~

I had watched the movie Spanglish, and the ending brought a huge realization.  There was a stand-off between a mom and her daughter.  The mom said, in her thick Spanish accent,  "No space between us!"  It was emotional and desperate and true.  In that moment, I applied it to my relationship with my step-daughter.  I wanted so much to be close with her.  But I also knew that she was/is her mother's daughter.  Not mine, by birth.  Having been so in love with Ashley's song weeks before, it was hidden in my heart.  And, at just the right time, the Lord used those words to minister to me as I bled, emotionally.  I was called to love a child who was not my own.  And I did.  I was realizing that I had not been loving unconditionally.  My expectations had gotten in the way.  She was not my own.  There were certain things I could expect - but a return on my investment, when I wanted it, was not one of them.

Love is a gamble that we take.  And in the words of another poignant song...  "It's never for nothing."  Margaret Becker sang, "It's never for nothing, when you love with no return.  It's never for nothing.  You light your candle in the darkness.  But it's never for nothing."  Lord, help me to completely trust Your love.  Help me to trust You.  Please forgive my selfish piety.  Help me to honor You from this day forward.  Father, give me enough grace to share with others.  Ashley sings, "All that You bring to the table is love, and that is so much. That is so much.  (It really is) more than enough to feed us."  Father, help me to be grateful for the love that You've given.  Thank You for loving me.  May I always be satisfied in You.  In Jesus' name.  Amen.

***
Now, that same daughter... my beautiful daughter... has her own precious little baby growing inside.  Tatum is 26, and she's expected to give birth in July.  I am so hugely blessed by the tender-loving relationship we share today.  Her dad and I get texts within minutes of the news she gets concerning the baby.  That's a closeness I never thought I'd have, back then... and one I cherish today!  I love you, Tatum Marie!

What does it look like?

"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands..." (btw, "in the same way" means that something came before this that was related to what is now being said.  it's always a good idea to go back a few lines, or even a complete section, in the Bible to find out what it was that brought the writer to this place. in this case, people who believe in Jesus are being reminded of the hope that they have in Him, and what it means to live in a world that is lost.)

"...so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives." (1Peter 3) He goes on to say that looking pretty on the outside may win his heart for a moment, but when your beauty comes from inside, you could win him forever!  What a thought!

So, if we were doing this study together, in my living room, I'd have you look up the words:

* submissive * purity * reverence * gentle * quiet *

And then we'd talk about them.  We might also talk about: adornment, inner self, unfading, what it means to live like you don't (and do) believe in the word, and how it feels to win someone over.

Now, I may have lost some of you for a moment there.  But, hang with me for a minute...

There are so many young women who struggle with this. And many who are older, having missed the lessons in their younger days.  I'm seeing it over and over again - especially in girls.  And, if I'm honest, it's reflected in me, too.  We've missed the point... and the purpose!

So, here's what I'm thinking...

Does this only apply to wives?  A teen girl, for example, whose mother or father is harsh, mean, demanding.  Isn't it natural to return contempt with contempt? (that's a good word to look up, too.  i don't know why we don't do more contrasting word studies.)  And what's the response of the parent? How do you encourage someone to display kindness when what she really wants to do is tell her mom off?  Does it matter?  YES!  

Imagine turning your household upside-down with a simple thing like a positive attitude, and a friendly smile!  Don't you believe in the Word?  And what's keeping you from being nice?  What's going on inside?  How much junk is clogging an outpouring of gentleness in your life (and mine)?!

"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." (Prov. 15:1)  There you have it.  God says, "gentle > harsh"  In fact, there are positive results with gentleness, and a flurry of "negative emotion" when we are harsh, demanding and mean.  Go figure. 

Let's apply it...

What does it mean to function without contempt... what is a gentle and quiet spirit?... does kindness count?  ... how can this apply more broadly?... what are the tendencies of women, young and old?... do you (I) believe the word of God?

Discuss... ;)